Bent But Not Broken
by UniTree
Summary: After the war Harry is a broken man. He almost dies from not taking care of himself. One day Ginny can take no more. She steps in a saves the man to saved the world.


Notes: This is a sad story with a happy ending.

* * *

It had been 2 weeks since the war ended. Harry had left Percy's room to use the loo nothing else. He couldn't remember the last time he had eaten. He drank a little water but that was it. He wished for death so he wouldn't hurt others anymore.

Hermione had her forehead against his door, continuing at her failed attempts at getting him to come out. "Harry, please," Hermione pleaded, a few tears falling.

Harry just sat looking out the window not moving.

"Mione he won't come out." Ron whispered pulling her away from the door into a hug.

Hermione slumped against him. "We can't let him do this to himself," she choked out.

"Ginny has a plan. We are all leaving for a week and going to see Fleur's family. We're leaving in a few hours. Ginny is going to try to get Harry to talk." Ron said hugging her and then kissing her softly putting his forehead against hers.

"Good," Hermione whispered.

3 hours later the Burrow had only two people in it. Harry hadn't move in over 6 hours. Ginny had borrowed Ron's wand so she could use it, her age hindering her from using hers. She pointed it at Percy's door and cleanly blasted it off its hinges and resting it on the wall. Harry didn't move.

"Get out," Ginny demanded, her voice weak but firm. Harry just sat there. "For Merlin's sake get out of this bloody room," Ginny yelled.

"Why do you care?" Harry voice was raw firm not being used.

Ginny took a breath, "Why do you think?"

"You feel sorry for me." Harry whispered putting his head down and letting tears fill his eyes.

Ginny hesitantly moved into the room. "Why would I feel sorry for you? You did this to yourself."

"I killed your bother." Harry said still not moving.

"No, Death Eaters did," Ginny said firmly, taking a few more steps.

"I kill her." Harry whispered. "She loved me and I killed her."

"Who," Ginny asked softly.

"She did nothing but try to protect me." Harry whispered shaking.

Even though she thought she knew the answer, Ginny asked again, "Who, Harry?"

"Lily." Harry chocked out.

Ginny took another step. "She was your mother, of course she protected you. It was her choice to protect you, she loved- she loves you. You didn't kill her, Voldemort did."

"If she had a better son she's be alive." Harry whispered. When he turned Ginny could see the cuts he'd made on his arms with his wand.

Ginny gasped, her hand shooting to her mouth. Tears started to fall. "You think you're a bad son? Would a bad son risk his life over and over to finish the job his parents died trying to do?"

Harry moved his wand to his arm and cut it again.

Ginny shot forward and took his wand from his frail hand. She threw it across the room, into the hall. Harry just shook as he looked at his blood covered arms.

Ginny was crying silently as she wrapped her arms around him, tucking his head under hers. "Please stop this, Harry."

"I don't deserve to live if everyone I love dies because of me." Harry sobbed into her neck.

"Stop it," Ginny choked out. "They did not die for you, they died for the cause. They died so everyone who lives and the next generation could have better lives. They died so little Muggleborns had a chance. They knew they what they were getting into, do you think they would have gone to fight if they didn't know they might die?" Ginny held him tightly.

Harry just sobbed against her soaking her in his blood. She could feel his ribs and he was barely able to sit up straight. His breathing was hard and he almost seamed to be going on just for her.

Ginny cried harder as she felt him. "Please. Stop doing this to yourself," Ginny sobbed.

"Why shouldn't I die?" Harry asked holding her as tightly as he could.

"Because I love you and couldn't stand it if you died again," Ginny cried.

"You love me?" Harry asked as if the idea was new to him. Ginny had her head on his shoulder as she nodded.

"I've never said that to someone before." Harry whispered.

"You don't have to say it back," Ginny said softly.

"I lo . . . love you . . . too." Harry whispered in an innocent voice. Ginny took a shaky breath as she pulled back a bit, cupping his face.

"Please help me." Harry begged shaking.

Ginny kiss him lightly. "Please let me." Harry moved forward and kissed her again. This time he seamed to almost get energy from her.

Ginny kissed him back lightly, as if he would break with one wrong touch. She pulled back, "You need to eat something, love."

"I can't remember the last time I did." Harry whispered. When he stood up he was so weak he fell to the ground. Ginny fell to her knees next to him, panicked.

"Don't... don't move. Let me bring it to you," Ginny whispered. Harry crawled to the bed like he did every night. He was breathing as if he ran miles.

Ginny took in another staggering breath, her insides tearing apart as she watched him. "I'll be right back," she said real softly, kissing his scar.

Harry laid in bed and looked at the door until Ginny walked back in it. He gave her a weak smile. "Missed you."

Ginny smiled at him feebly. She set a tray down on the bedside table. It was soup and bread with pumpkin juice. "Want me to feed you, love?" Ginny asked.

Harry nodded and blushed a little. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be," Ginny kissed his scar again as she sat down next to him carefully.

Harry opened his mouth and let the warmth fill him. He ate everything Ginny gave him.

"Thank you beautiful." Harry whispered.

"Your welcome, handsome," Ginny smiled, stroking his hallow-looking cheek

"Why do you still love me after all the pain I put you threw?" Harry d enjoying her touch.

"That's what love is," Ginny whispered, watching him lean into her touch.

"Will you sleep with me?" Harry asked looking scared at her answer. Ginny nodded. Harry smiled a little brighter. "I liked holding you on the couch by the fire. It was the best part of my day." Ginny smiled lightly. Ginny laid down next to him, being wary of his fragile body.

"You were the first person I thought would protect me." Harry whispered holding her close as he could.

"Everyone wanted to, everyone tried," Ginny whispered. She then reached for Ron's wand from the table.

"What are you doing?" Harry asked scared.

"I need to heal you, love," Ginny said softly, also asking a question.

"Will it hurt?" Harry whispered.

"I won't let anything hurt you," Ginny kissed his cheek softly. She then took his arm, pressing the wand to each of the red cuts.

Harry watched his skin heal. He weakly took off his shirt and his pants reveling more. His boxers were thin and Ginny could tell he hadn't bathed in a while.

"Oh, Harry," Ginny bit her lip as she saw all the cuts. She healed them and then turned to Harry. "Are you able to take a bath or do you want to wait?"

"Can you help me?" Harry asked looking away from her and blushing. "I can't do it myself."

"I'll do anything you ask," Ginny put her hand on his chest. She got up and held her hands out.

Harry and Ginny walked to the bathroom. Harry sat as Ginny few him a bath. He slowly took off his boxers. He watched Ginny look him up and down.

Ginny blushed a bit and stood to help him into the tub.

"Will you ta . . . take it with me?" Harry asked shyly.

Ginny smiled softly. "Anything you ask," Ginny nodded. She held onto his thin form as he got into the tub. She then pulled off her clothes, her face flushing.

Harry looked at her. And blushed. "You're truly beautiful." Harry whispered. His body was too weak to do a proper response. "I can't . . . right now." Harry whispered as she got into the tub. She moved half onto his lap.

Ginny kissed him lightly. "It's fine... and thank you."

"I would any other time." Harry said resting his chin on her shoulder.

Ginny took his hand, running her thumb over his knuckles. "I know, love."

Harry wrapped his arms around her. "One day will you marry me?" Harry asked innocently.

Ginny grinned. "Of course."

"Mrs. Potter." Harry said with almost a playful smile.

Ginny grinned brighter than she had in a long time. "I used to write that on my papers when I was little."

"You didn't love me then. You loved him." Harry whispered into her skin. "I'm not Harry Potter to you. I'm Harry."

"I love you, Harry," Ginny whispered, turning to stare into his green eyes.

"I love you too." Harry said kissing her softly. He weakly rubbed her back. Ginny lightly rubbed his side but stopped when she reached his evident ribs.

Harry groaned softly. "Hurts." He whispered.

Ginny gasped, moving away from him a bit. "I'm sorry," she bit her lip, looking concerned and nervous.

"It's alright Ginny. I like feeling close to you." Harry said weakly pulling her back.

"I don't want to hurt you," Ginny whispered.

"I rather feel close to you." Harry said looking down at the water. Ginny made sure to lean against the tub and not on Harry as she allowed him to pull her closer. She looked up into his face and bit her cheek against tears. Harry weakly held her crying softly from the pain of being so weak.

Ginny let a few tears fall as she gently wiped away his tears. "I'm going to take care of you, okay?"

"Only you." Harry whispered.

"Only me," Ginny said softly. Harry laid back in the water as Ginny started to slowly wash his body. He moaned and groaned if she hit a sore spot.

Ginny sucked in a breath whenever he groaned, not having seen the bruises under the water. Once she was finished, she noticed something that she hadn't noticed before through all the cuts. "What...?" Ginny lightly touched a long scar on his chest and an oval one.

"From the spell Tom threw at me and the locket." Harry whispered taking her hand. Ginny remained silent even though she was a bit confused. She knew he'd tell her everyone at some point. Harry softly kissed and back of her hand.

"Ill tell you everything you ask."

"Later," Ginny whispered, making him better was her first priority.

Harry nodded. He touched a scar on her side. "From the school year?" Harry asked. Ginny made a face at the memory, nodding.

"What happened?" Harry whispered looking sad.

"Helped Dennis Creevey escape from detention and I got caught," Ginny whispered quietly, looking down at the water.

Harry pulled her as best as he could into his arms and held her against him. "I didn't protect you by breaking up with you did I?" Harry whispered nuzzling her neck. Ginny remained silent.

"I'm a Weasley," she muttered, "I was a main target to begin with."

"I'm sorry." Harry said in a bare whisper.

"It's fine, love. You did what you had to do," Ginny said softly.

"No I did what was easy." Harry whispered.

"Saving the world isn't easy."

"Breaking up with you so I wouldn't have to deal with my feelings was the easy way out." Harry whispered.

"You didn't have time to deal with you feelings," Ginny murmured.

"I should have made it. You are so much more important to me that I showed." Harry said kissing a spot under her jaw line.

"You have time to show it now," Ginny looked up at him.

"I plan to." Harry said nuzzling her neck softly. "For the rest of our lives."

Ginny smiled. After a moment, the water started to cool. "Want to get out?"

Harry nodded softly. He tried to get up but couldn't on his own.

"No, don't," Ginny got out and wrapped a towel around her. She bent down to help him get up and out.

Harry was shaking softly after he got out of the water. They went back to his room. Ginny used Ron's wand to clean his room and change his sheets."Thanks it was starting to look bad here." Harry said blushing.

"No problem," Ginny smiled lightly as she sat him on his bed. She went to get one of his shirts and pulled it on before getting another and some boxers for him.

Harry slowly dressed himself and got into his bed. He smiled at Ginny went she got in next to him. "Are you my girlfriend again?" Harry whispered looking at her. They were both on their sides facing each other.

Ginny just had his shirt on as she took his hand gently. "I never stopped," she whispered.

"I wouldn't blame you if you did but were there other guys when I was gone?" Harry asked softly.

Ginny shook her head, lightly stroking his cheek. "Of course not. For one, I love you. Also, there wasn't much time for anything like that."

"Good." Harry whispered with a light smile on his face.

Ginny smiled before quirking an eyebrow. "Were there any other girls?"

"Yeah Hermione and I had a torrid affair with Ron watching." Harry chuckled softly.

Ginny rolled her eyes.

"Can I kiss you?" Harry whispered tracing her lips with a finger.

Ginny parted her lips under his touch, nodding lightly.

Harry moved slowly forward and used all his energy to kiss Ginny the way she should be. His tongue was strong against hers. His hand moved up and cupped her cheek.

Ginny moaned into his mouth.

Harry moved his lips to her neck. "Miss you so much." He said crying as he kissed her neck.

Ginny whimpered slightly. "Dreamed about this."

Harry started making a small love bite. "Was hard to sleeping next to your brother." Harry whispered as his tears hit her skin.

Ginny gently pushed him back, which didn't take much. She wiped his tears before kissing his cheek.

"No feels good." Harry said trying to move back to her neck.

"Harry, don't try to push yourself, please," Ginny whispered.

"I just want to kiss my girlfriend." He whispered in a heartbreaking voice.

Ginny looked at him sadly before moving forward to kiss him softly.

Harry laid on his back so he wouldn't get as tired and let Ginny come closer. "Do you like this?" Harry asked nervously as he kissed her neck.

"Yes," Ginny moaned lightly. "I've been waiting for this for a year."

"Me too." Harry said smiling shyly. "I thought about you a lot when I was alone."

Ginny smiled, caressing his cheek. "Me too. While I was trying to go to sleep, you were the only thing that would calm me down enough."

"I wasn't trying to sleep." Harry said with a sheepish smile and a blush.

Ginny grinned, kissing his lips.

Harry opened his mouth and let her control the kiss. He just put his arms around her and enjoyed feeling her bare thighs against his leg.

Ginny smiled against his lips as she held herself up with an arm. Ginny kissed him gently.

Harry broke the kiss. He looked into her eyes. "Tell me what you dreamed of when I was gone."

Harry moved his hand from her waist to cup her bum. "I dreamed of red hair and freckled skin." He said in the huskiest voice he could.

Ginny moaned, her eyes closing as her skin burned where he touched it.

Harry moved his hand under the shirt and stroked the skin of her lower back.

"Harry," Ginny whispered. "We have to stop."

"Don't . . . don't you like . . . this?" Harry whispered a little hurt.

"Too much," Ginny muttered.

"Sorry." harry whispered moving his hand. "I just like feeling your skin. Makes me feel better."

Ginny moved onto her side. "We have to take it slow, love. You're too sick." Ginny moved his hand to her hip where the shirt had ridden up a bit.

"I don't wanna do much I just don't want to jip you out of anything. And I like knowing to like it." Harry said grinning a little.

"I don't care what we're doing, as long as I'm with you, I'm beyond happy," Ginny whispered.

Harry nuzzled her neck. "You take good care of me." Harry whispered in a sleepy tone.

"I love you, Harry," Ginny whispered as she felt Harry fall to sleep. She pulled the blanket over him. Harry moved closer to Ginny as he fell to sleep.

Ginny woke up, smiling as she felt Harry's arms weakly around her. She turned and brushed the hair away from his face. He was still deep asleep so she gently got out of the bed, careful not to wake him, and went to her room. She put on some knickers and shorts and went to the kitchen to start breakfast.

Harry woke up and found he was alone. He was sad that he woke up from the wonderful dream that he had the night before. He go to kiss Ginny again and now he was back to his hell. He grabbed his wand that was on his table and cut his arms again. He was crying when he saw the door open and Ginny standing there.

She had come to check on him while breakfast was cooking. Her hand went to her mouth, her eyes wide. "What're you doing," Ginny whispered.

"I thought I dreamed yesterday." Harry whispered looking down at his arm.

Ginny fell to her knees next to his bed. Tears were falling as she grabbed her wand to heal the cuts.

Harry looked at her weakly. "Sorry." He whispered taking her hand.

"It's okay," Ginny whispered sadly, putting her forehead on his shoulder.

"I thought you didn't want me anymore." Harry whispered holding her weakly.

"Why would you think that," Ginny asked, holding onto his shirt.

"I thought yesterday was a dream." Harry whispered.

"It wasn't," Ginny said softly.

Harry just cried softly as he held her.

"It's okay, love. Please calm down," Ginny said, her voice cracking as she tried to sooth him.

Harry just kissed her neck softly and pulled back. "Sorry."

"It's okay, baby," Ginny kissed his cheek. She stood up.

"Do I smell bacon?" Harry asked.

Ginny smiled, nodding. "Be right back."

Harry got back into the bed and moved against the wall.

Ginny went to get their breakfast. She came back up, tray in hand.

Harry smiled at her when she got back. "Missed you." He whispered.

"Miss you, too," Ginny sat down next to him, setting the tray in her lap.

Harry grabbed a fork and slowly started to feed himself.

Ginny smiled, watching him for a moment before taking a piece of bacon.

Harry kissed the back of her hand after eating about half of the eggs.

"Good?"

"Yeah but I'm full." Harry said softly.

Ginny kissed his cheek. "That's good. I hate to see you so skinny... I'm like my Mum I guess."

"Please don't say your like your mum when we're in bed together." Harry said making a face.

Ginny giggled. "Sorry, love."

"Can we maybe do some more of what we did last night?" Harry asked turning red.

"If you're up for it," Ginny smiled lightly.

"I don't think I'll be up for a while." Harry said looking away.

Ginny stroked his cheek. "You know what I mean."

"I want to." Harry said softly.

"Anything you want, baby," Ginny whispered.

"No I want to have an . . ." Harry said pointing down.

"Oh," Ginny blushed a bit. "In time, love."

"Doesn't it bother you that I don't get one?" Harry whispered.

"We wouldn't be able to do anything, love, if you did have one," Ginny said gently. "You're still sick."

Harry nodded. "What if I wasn't?" Harry whispered not looking at her.

"I guess we'd start where we left off," Ginny murmured.

"I'm not pushing you I just don't know what you want." Harry said taking her hand.

"I know, love," Ginny gently rested her head on his shoulder.

"So tell me what I can do." Harry said putting his arm around her and rubbing her side lightly.

"For now, you can kiss me," she whispered.

Harry nodded.

"I'll let you know what you can do once you're better, yeah?"

"I just don't want to cross a line. I'll do whatever you want."

"How long are we going to be together," Ginny asked, looking into his eyes.

"Forever." Harry said as if there was not other answer.

"Then there is no line," Ginny whispered. "But we're still going to take it slow. We have time now."

"So I can feel you up?" Harry asked laughing.

Ginny rolled her eyes but smiled at the sound of his laugh.

"Is it alright if I just touch you waist or something under your shirt so I can feel your skin?" Harry asked innocently.

Ginny nodded, moving his hand to her waist, under the shirt. "Love you," Ginny whispered.

"Love you too." Harry said laying down with his arms around her waist.

Ginny smiled. "What would you like to do today?"

"This." Harry whispered

"Okay," Ginny smiled.

"You can ask me questions if you want." Harry whispered.

"Are you sure?"

"Anything and I will try to answer."

"Where did you go after the wedding," Ginny asked, starting at the beginning.

"Grimmauld place." Harry whispered.

"Were you ever caught," Ginny asked.

"Yes. We went to Malfoy Manor and Hermione almost was killed by Bellatrix." Harry whispered.

Ginny's eyes widened.

Harry nuzzled her neck.

"Is... is that where... she got that scar," Ginny asked softly.

"Yes." Harry whispered.

Ginny took a breath. "Did you really break into Gringotts?"

"Yes we rode a dragon to Hogwarts." Harry said softly.

"Were you involved in the breakout at the Ministry?"

"Yes." Harry nodded holding her a little closer.

"What was the locket you were talking about," Ginny asked softly.

"The Slytherin locket. It had a part of Tom's soul in it. We had to kill it to kill him. It tried to kill me in a lake." Harry whispered.

Ginny held him a bit tighter than she knew she should. "Just the locket to kill him?"

"7 parts of his soul. One was inside of me. That's why I had to die." Harry whispered.

Ginny sucked in a breath.

"Why did you live," Ginny asked, weakly.

"Because I had you to live for," Harry whispered, his voice cracking.

"Thank you," Ginny choked out.

"I couldn't leave you." Harry said moving his hand up a little brushing her skin with his thumb.

"I'll be sure to make it worth it." She whispered.

"What do you have in mind?" Harry asked pulling her closer.

"Making love to you, marrying you, giving you a family," Ginny said into his chest.

Harry smirked a little. "Saying that had an effect." Harry whispered.

Ginny smiled lightly.

"What part?"

"All three and I like the order by the way." Harry said taking her hand and lacing it with his.

Ginny smiled up at him. "Do you want a family?"

"You will be a wonderful mum." Harry smiled lightly.

"You'll be an amazing dad," Ginny caressed his cheek.

"Three." Harry nodded.

Ginny smirked. "I like that number. If you had said any more, I'd have to knock some sense into you, love."

Harry moved a little closer. "I want you to have everything you want. I have all the money in the world. I can give you everything."

"I just want you," Ginny kissed him before biting her lip against a grin, "and the money."

Harry moved her hand over his heart. "You have all of me." He nodded.

Ginny moved his hand to her heart. "I'm yours."

Harry moved his hand a little to the left. He grinned shyly.

Ginny blushed, biting her lip against a small moan.

"I like touching you." Harry said nuzzling her neck. Ginny could tell how much energy he was using

"I like you touching me," Ginny whispered, lightly rubbed the side of his neck. "Are you tired?"

Harry shook his head no and then yes.

Ginny kissed his cheek. "Want to take a nap?

"I don't want to be a cripple." Harry said sadly.

"You're not, love. You're just sick. You'll get better soon enough," Ginny said soothingly.

"Isn't there some spell you can do?" Harry asked.

"I wouldn't know, I haven't learned those yet. I can go ask my Mum if you like," Ginny suggested. "Though it might be healthier if you get better naturally."

Harry pulled her closer scared she would leave and not come back.

"I'm here, love," Ginny whispered, nuzzling his neck gently.

"I just want to be Harry Smith." Harry said crying softly.

"It's okay, love. Everything is safe now, you can live a normal life," Ginny reassured him.

Harry feel softly to sleep as Ginny held him.

Ginny sighed as she lightly rubbed his back. It broke her heart to see him so vulnerable and weak.

When Harry woke up he was starving. His body was starting to kick back on. "Hi."

"Good... afternoon," Ginny smiled. "Want lunch?"

"I'm starving." Harry nodded.

"I'll be right back. Want soup or a sandwich?'

"More than that." Harry asked softly.

"Okay, give me a minute," Ginny kissed him lightly before sliding off the bed.

When she came back he ate all three sandwiches, 4 bowls of soup, the half loft of bread and a full container of pumpkin juice. "Thanks."

Ginny looked slightly shocked. "Your welcome," she laughed.

"I feel better." Harry said kissing her hand.

"I'm glad," Ginny smiled.

Harry pulled Ginny down and snuggled up against her.

Ginny cuddled close to him, smiling contently.

"Love you." Harry said holding her a little stronger.

"I love you," Ginny whispered.

Harry slide his hand up from her belly. "I think Little Harry is waking up." Harry said into her ear.

Ginny bit back a grin. "Oh really?"

He moved her hand over her boxers.

Her face blushed as she smirked.

"That's what you do to me." Harry said moving on his side and fitting his body against her pressing into her hip.

Ginny moaned lightly, looking into his eyes.

"So can we snog or something?" Harry asked softly.

"Or something," Ginny put her hand on his neck as she kissed him gently.

Harry moved his hand or her waist as she turned on her side fitting his hips against his. He moaned into her mouth. He hand rubbing her side lightly.

Ginny put her fingers into his hair like she always did.

Harry's hand moved to cup her breast touching her softly. This was as far as they had gone before. Harry felt himself harden a little more.

Ginny moaned as she pressed a little closer to him.

"Can I move you shirt?" Harry asked pulling away.

Ginny nodded, breathing a bit harder.

Harry took her shirt off and his jaw dropped a little as he looked at her.

"You've seen me before, Harry," Ginny whispered, blushing.

"Not knowing you are going to let me do something." Harry said lacking his mouth onto her.

Ginny kissed him back harder, running her tongue across his lips.

Harry's hand moved up and toyed with her. His hips rocked a little.

Ginny gasped loudly, her body arching.

"Ok?" Harry whispered.

Ginny nodded, panting already.

Harry testing put his mouth of her right breast. His other hand played with her left. He rocked softly against her.

"Merlin," Ginny practically cried out, her chest moving up as she moved her hips.

Harry sucked harder and grazed her with his teeth. His hand moved and cupped her over her shorts pressing softly into her.

"Fuck," Ginny gasped, pushing against his hand, her body arching even more as her fingers tightened in his hair.

Harry kept up everything he was doing. He lifted her hand and placed it on him hoping she might do something to him.

While Ginny was panting, she rubbed him over his boxers.

Harry moved his lips to her neck touching and grinning against her. He was tired and close and felt 100 feelings at once. He didn't want to leave Ginny like that.

Ginny could feel his movements slowing, turning weak. "You... can stop," Ginny gasped.

"No." Harry said firmly. He was not going to stop until she came. He didn't came about himself.

Ginny didn't want him to hurt himself, so she took his hand that was cupping her and put it down her shorts and knickers. She sucked in a breath.

When Harry felt her wet and warm he came in his boxers. He slowly moved two fingers in and out of her. He felt Ginny's hand touching herself helping him. When she came he moved faster. Before Ginny came down from her orgasm he was sleeping with his fingers still in her.

Ginny had cried out, moaning his name as she panting for air. She left his fingers inside her as she watched him fall asleep. Ginny brushed his hair away from his eyes.

Harry woke up 3 hours later. Ginny was next to him. "I'm sorry." He said starting to cry. "I didn't want to leave you hanging."

Ginny kissed him softly. "It's fine, baby. It felt amazing," Ginny whispered, holding him close. His fingers weren't inside her anymore, she had gone to clean herself up while he was asleep.

"I wanted to make you feel good and it made me so tired." Harry sobbed.

"It's okay, you did make me feel good," Ginny rubbed his back, kissing his neck lightly.

"What's wrong with me?" Harry asked.

"You're just sick, baby. It's okay, everything is okay. You'll be fine," Ginny rocked them gently.

Harry took an hour to stop crying. "Can we have dinner?" Harry whispered.

"Of course," Ginny kissed him softly. She got up. "Want me to bring it up here?"

Harry nodded softly looking a little embarrassed.

"Dinner in bed, wish I'd gotten that," Ginny kissed his scar, smiling, as she went downstairs to fix dinner.

Ginny brought Harry a big steak and a mashed and some mixed vegs. Harry all but wolfed it down.

"That was good." Harry smiled.

"Glad I didn't try and get a bite, I would have gotten my hand bit off," Ginny smirked as she finished her smaller meal.

"I haven't eaten well in weeks." Harry said shyly.

"I wasn't saying it was bad. I'm glad you're eating," Ginny kissed him.

"Can we take a bath together again?" Harry whispered rubbing her hand.

Ginny smiled, "Anything, baby."

"How about the first thing on your list?" Harry asked turning red.

"When?"

Harry moved his hand into hers, he shrugged.

"When I can." Harry said.

Ginny stroked his cheek again. "Are you sure you'll be able to?"

"I saved the world so I could." Harry laughed softly.

"You know what I mean, love." Ginny thought for a moment, "I want to, you know that right?"

"I felt that earlier." Harry whispered with a soft smile.

Ginny blushed a bit. "I don't want you to get hurt, to overexert yourself. We'll see how you feel, okay?"

Harry looked at her. "I . . . I want to. I want to be a part of you."

Ginny cupped his face in her hand. "Me too, love. I want to feel you inside me. But I don't want you to hurt yourself. And please don't tell me you feel fine if you don't. In three days, that won't be your only chance. Remember that we have forever, we can wait until you feel better."

Harry nodded. "Can we go take a bath now?" Harry whispered.

Ginny kissed him. "Let me go start it."

Harry slowly walked to the bathroom. He saw Ginny had the bath ready. "Hi."

"Hey," Ginny smiled.

Harry slowly stripped and sat down because of the effort.

Ginny pulled off the shirt she had put back on earlier and her shorts and knickers.

Harry slowly got into the tub and pulled Ginny between his legs and wrapped his arms around her. His chin on her shoulder.

Ginny rested her head on his shoulder. "This is nice, love."

"I like it." Harry said groaning softly at the feeling of the hot water.

"I'm glad we have this time to ourselves."

"Me too." Harry said holding her a lot tighter than he could just the day before.

"I'm also glad you're getting better so soon, baby."

"Only you could do it." Harry said nuzzling her neck.

"Is there anything you want to ask me?" Ginny put her hand over his.

"Why did you move my hand before?" Harry whispered. "The real reason."

"I didn't want you to hurt yourself," Ginny said softly.

Harry nodded and a single tear rolled off his nose.

Ginny wiped the tear away. "But I also wanted it," Ginny whispered. "It felt amazing."

"But your first answer was because I was too weak to keep going." Harry said knowing that was the truth.

"But that doesn't mean I enjoyed it, doesn't mean I wanted it," Ginny said quietly. "You know I'd never do anything I didn't want."

Harry nodded holding her tightly.

"Anything else you want to ask, love?" Ginny kissed his neck softly.

"Am I pushing you to make love faster than you want?" Harry whispered.

"No." Ginny said softly but firmly. "I... I was thinking of doing it on your birthday last year..." She blushed.

Harry kissed the side of her neck. He moved her hand onto him. "Only yours." Harry whispered.

Ginny then moved his hand to her center. "Yours. Always and forever."

Harry shivered. "You have no idea how much I want to and how much it hurts that I can't right now." Harry said into her neck moving his hand so he wouldn't start something he couldn't finish.

"Sorry," Ginny muttered.

"It's not your fault." Harry whispered. "Can I tell you something?" Harry whispered.

"Of course," Ginny nodded.

"Last night I was going to . . . Kill myself . . . before you came in." Harry whispered into her skin.

Ginny stopped breathing as tears started to fall quickly.

"You saved me." Harry said holding her tightly.

"Why," Ginny choked out, her hand holding his tightly.

"I didn't want to hurt anymore." Harry whispered. "Until you came into my room I haven't stopped hurting since I was a baby."

"The war is over," Ginny gasped out. "You don't have to hurt now but you wouldn't let anyone help you." Her breathing was shallow.

"I know that now." harry said holding her tightly.

"I feel good when you hold me." Harry whispered.

"But you wouldn't let me hold you," Ginny said, trying to breath. "You wouldn't let anyone near you.

"I was stupid." Harry said into her neck.

"Please," Ginny pleaded. "Don't do that again. If you're feeling bad, come to me. Please." Ginny was crying silently.

Harry nodded and kissed her tears away. "You're my net." Harry whispered.

"Let me catch you then," Ginny begged.

Harry nodded kissing her deeply.

Ginny kissed him back, her tears falling into the water. She pulled back, resting her forehead against his. "I love you, Harry."

"Love you too Mrs. Potter." Harry tired to make her feel better.

Ginny smiled feebly.

"I didn't tell you t upset you. I told you to tell you how much you saved me."

"I know," Ginny murmured, moving her hand back to his neck.

"Tonight. I feel good. Please let me try." Harry asked holding her firmly.

"Harry, don't push yourself," Ginny begged again.

"I want to try. That's all I ask." Harry whispered.

"Harry... Don't take this the wrong way, please," Ginny turned around to cup his face. "But I don't want to try, I want to do it. I want to make love to you, to do it right. I want us both to be healthy and ready and able."'

Harry hide his face in her neck but he nodded.

"That's not a rejection... it's just... a rain check," Ginny whispered. "I want to, I really do. Please understand."

Harry nodded. "I understand." Harry said in a raw voice.

Ginny took a breath as she put her forehead against his neck. "I love you, Harry. With everything I have."

"I know." Harry nodded. "Love you too." Harry said softly.

"We can do anything but," Ginny whispered. "It's up to you."

Harry moved his hand and cupped her. "We can always have a little fun still can't we?" Harry asked.

Ginny whimpered.

Harry turned her around he was rock hard. He had her stranding him. "Could do it here." He said using his hand and moving hers to him.

Ginny moaned as she wrapped her hand around him.

Harry moved himself between her thighs. "You want me admit it." He said rubbing himself on her.

Ginny gasped at the feeling of him so close. She moved away a little. "Harry, I said..."

"But I can. I'm ok." Harry nodded quickly. "I feel good." He said using his eyes to beg her.

"No, you're not," Ginny gasped.

Harry looked in the water. "Feel that and tell me I'm not."

"Harry, please. Not now," Ginny begged.

Harry moved a few fingers inside of her and rubbed her nub. He put her hand back on him.

"Thank you," she mumbled before gasping. She wrapped her hand around him and started pumping.

Harry put his face in her neck and Ginny could feel him crying softly. He was a little rougher that before but not overly so.

Ginny put her hand on the back of his neck before she cried out as he twisted his fingers. She started to pump harder.

"Sure you don't want me come me to come inside you?" Harry groaned.

"Harry, don't," a few tears fell from Ginny's eyes. She continued to pump as he rubbed her nub. After a moment, he moved his fingers some more, pushing hard on her nub. She screamed his name.

Harry gritted his teeth and came hard. Once he finished he pulled her to his chest and fitting himself between her thighs and just lay there. "I shouldn't have . . . I'm so . . . sorry." Harry said holding her tightly. He did enjoy the feeling of where he was though.

Ginny was panting, her head against his neck. "It's okay, love," Ginny cooed, rubbing his chest.

"I want to . . . be better . . . be whole for you . . . I want to give you what I should have before." Harry said holding her tightly.

"Harry, love, we have time. There's no need to rush this anymore." Ginny whispered, "We have our whole life."

"I saved the world I deserve this." Harry said bitterly. "I deserve to be able to make love to the woman who saved me." Harry broke down into her neck.

Ginny held him to her tightly, crying silently. "You do, I'm sorry," Ginny choked out.

"I want the life I was promised." Harry said rubbing her back as they both cried.

"You are getting that. You have to be able to see that," Ginny sobbed. "This is the start."

Harry just Held her tightly. He grabbed his wand and Apprated them to his room. He cast a drying spell and just held Ginny against him. He put himself back between her thighs.

Ginny cried into his chest, holding him tightly.

They fell sleep just as they were. Harry was getting stronger and it was somehow making Ginny a little weaker.

5 days later Harry was more or less physically healed. He had been eating like an ogre and have gained some weight back in a very short time. But Ginny has some questions to his mental state. He had gone back to looking out the window for long periods of time.

Harry looked out the window for the 5th hour. He had a soft smile on his face.

Ginny bit her lip. "Harry?" She walked into the room. She had gone to the bathroom, having just say on the bed, waiting for Harry to move.

Harry just looked out the window before looking at Ginny. "Do you think Dad knew that Mum was going to die?"

"What?" Ginny furrowed her brow.

"After Dad crossed over before Mum died do you think he knew she would be with him soon?" Harry asked.

Ginny looked at him, worried. She answered anyway. "Probably."

Harry went back to looking out the window. The wheels turning in his mind.

Ginny took another step forward, putting her hand on his shoulder. "Harry, what're you doing?"

"Thinking." Harry whispered. "Sometimes I think I see them. Behind me where you are right now. But when I turn round they are always gone."

"They're probably watching after you," Ginny whispered. "Harry... I understand that you need to think... but you can't just sit here hours on end..."

"I could have brought them back." Harry whispered. "I could have had a family."

Ginny let a tear roll down her face. "They wouldn't have been back," Ginny whispered, knowing the story. "Not in the way you'd want them to be. They'd be unhappy." Ginny looked at him for a moment before saying quietly, "You do have a family."

"You wanna know my first memory?" Harry whispered putting his head down.

"What?"

"I was young maybe 3 or 4. It was winter time and I was outside in a pair of shorts and a tee shirt because they wouldn't buy me winter things. I feel on some ice." Harry let his tears fall without stopping them. "I had a gash in my knee so I went to my aunt so she could fix it." Harry looked up at Ginny with hurt in his eyes. "I got beat with Uncle's belt for getting blood on his carpet. That's the kind of family they left me with. The people that were to protect me."

Ginny pulled him into a hug, tucking his head under her chin. "That's not what I meant," she whispered, her voice cracking. "They're not your family. I am, we are. Me, my parents, my brothers, and Hermione."

Harry cried into her neck. "I just wanted a fucking hug and a band aid." Harry said over and over.

Ginny clung to him, crying on his shoulder. "You didn't deserve that. You're a wonderful man who deserves way more than he got. You're going to have a good life from now on, I promise you."

"Be my family please?" Harry said holding her close to him.

"I already am," Ginny cried.

Harry held her as he sobbed. "How could they leave me? I needed them."

"They didn't want to leave you, Harry. But they had to so you could live. They had to so you would be protected. They loved you," Ginny sobbed.

"They love you," she rephrased.

Harry almost crushed Ginny he was holding her so tightly. "Marry me?" He asked into her neck. She couldn't hear the words but she knew what they were by the feel.

"Why," Ginny asked.

"Because I want you to be my family for real, because I love you, because Potter men love red heads." Harry said looking into her eyes praying for a yes.

Ginny nodded, tears still falling silently.

Harry stood up and walked to his dresser. He pulled out a box. It was a wedding ring that had been in his family for 5 generations. He slipped it on Ginny's finger.

Ginny gasped as she looked at the ring. It was simple yet elegant, nothing too flashy but gorgeous enough to catch your attention. Ginny leaned up to kiss him softly.

"I love you so much I feel like my heart might burst." Harry whispered.

"I love you, Harry," Ginny whispered, caressing his cheek. "But you know we can't get married."

Harry's face went blank and pale.

"Someday, someday soon even, but not now," Ginny whispered. "I'm underage and haven't finished school yet."

Harry nodded. "I didn't mean tonight. I mean within a few years." Harry asked.

"Okay, good," Ginny kissed him again. "I love you."


End file.
